So beautifully written, loved this bit 'You tell them how you feel and you see your words make an impression on their face like footprints in the snow.' really resonates, really want to make sure im having more mindful conversations. Thank you for writing!
Thanks so much for reading, Charlotte 🫶 It’s a shame that these conversations feel more difficult to come by lately. But we have the power to change things!
Amazing work!! This is such a good reminder to reject the attention economy and to be more present. My brain literally starts to hurt if im exposing myself to too much content.... a lesson to be learned!
I can relate so much to the head-throbbing/numbness that comes from having your head stuck in your device, all day every day. We really need the friction, the monotony, and the unstructured thought that comes with being present. Thank you for reading 💚
Absolutely! I feel sometimes being more deliberate with the way I consume media allows me to still be connected to entertainment but not "sucked into it". For example, id say that in a moderate amount, choosing the exact song you want to listen to while on a (boring) drive allows you to be able to appreciate your surrondings more instead of just hitting shuffle. Its being conscious with /what/ media we insert into our brains that allows to slowly break away from having to /need/ the media in our day to day life. Tis better to choose to listen to music because it will improve your day rather that you needing to listen to music because your brain craves dopamine. Thats the difference between music causing a headache vs music causing enjoyment ! Just something I realized while listening to Steely Dan this afternoon...
I think you're on to something with choosing to listen to music because it will improve your day rather that you needing to listen to music because your brain craves dopamine! It reminds me of the expression I heard once on responsible drinking: "don't drink to feel better, have a drink to feel even better"!
I loved this and completely agree. For me being present reading is the thing I mourn the most so I’m trying to read at leat five pages without picking up my phone. It sounds silly but the hold it has on me🪦
Totally relate to this! When I was little I could spend hours curled up in a corner reading. Now I have this knee-jerk like reaction every 15 minutes to check something. Here's to building better deep focus!
The quote is perfection ;) and I agree, sometimes I lift my eyes from my phone and enjoy this little bubble of awareness. Everyone is self-absorbed and I'm virtually invisible!
It’s sometimes nice to feel invisible, especially in a big hectic city! But I don’t want invisible to be my “default”, which it has become in recent years 🤣
Amen! I too have been consciously making effort to be present in similar ways as you - not taking phone out, leaving earphones out, taking in scenery when walking out and about. May we pave the change 👏🏼
This blew my mind!! I had never though about this. I had always been a headphone lover but this made me realize that maybe the sound of the outside is more meaningfull that my favorite songs. incredible work <3
I was recently in a waiting room and I knew it would take so much, I decided not to bring my phone but instead bring with me a book. I think that it changed everything and I wasn't even bored!
Loved this so much! This was really well written and soo warming to read!
I love when you said about waiting in the coffee shop for your order and bypassing the urge to scroll on your phone for a minute or two -I love doing this, and taking in all the sounds and the experience as a whole that kind of gets blurred & blocked out if you're so immersed in your phone instead!
I also love going out on my own on solo dates for the reason you mentioned about talking to the waiter/cashier.. I feel when there is someone with you -you limit yourself to other interactions with other people, because you're quick to get your order then go with them, rather than spark up a conversation with the cashier -it makes me feel so whole! And also it gives you a moment of stillness & presence by looking around and observing things on your own, rather than being wrapped up in a conversation with someone else.
If i'm in a cafe having a drink/lunch, sometimes I feel it's more 'comfortable' or 'normal' to be looking at my phone.. but for a year now i've been practicing taking a break and just looking around and people watching. It feels weird at first, but it becomes okay overtime, and it feels cool to be curious about the world/other peoples lives/thoughts, and i've really enjoyed the moment more by doing that!
It's true that you hear so much more sounds & conversations, and see the beauty of things and people's lives when you don't have your headphones in or aren't on your phone!
Love you and your cat at the end! Taking the cuddle in, being fully immersed in the moment!
"We need to jump off the hamster wheel of chasing grand experiences or perfect, Instagram-worthy moments. The beauty of presence lies in its simplicity." -Totally agree with this! Can't wait to read more from you! The way you write is so beautiful!
Thank you so much for your lovely comment, Louise! I really respect you on the solo dates, it's something I rarely prioritise doing but my friends who do this regularly absolutely love them as well.
Aww, you should try one out! :) The first one feels weird and is hard, but the more you practice & repeat something the easier it gets, and it's good to prioritise your alone time and being in your own company, and it's fun because you can do whatever you want that makes you happy, and spend however much time you want on your date! It's such a good feeling & form of self-love to do regularly! x
Well said! It’s not an easy change but it’s well worth it. I also have been trying to find small ways to shift away from the phone and be more present. I have noticed my mind is clearer and more focused as a result, and my memory has even improved.
Also try volunteering, somewhere, anywhere. It is hard and awkward to disappear into technology when you are helping someone. And it feels really good, unlike the artificial dopamine hit you get from clicking and scrolling.
This really hit home. I’m definitely guilty of spending too much time glued to my phone or plugged into my AirPods, and it’s wild to think about how much I might be missing in those moments. Even as a raging introvert, I know that real human connection is what makes life meaningful. Inspired to be more present. Thank you for this piece!
So beautifully written, loved this bit 'You tell them how you feel and you see your words make an impression on their face like footprints in the snow.' really resonates, really want to make sure im having more mindful conversations. Thank you for writing!
Thanks so much for reading, Charlotte 🫶 It’s a shame that these conversations feel more difficult to come by lately. But we have the power to change things!
Amazing work!! This is such a good reminder to reject the attention economy and to be more present. My brain literally starts to hurt if im exposing myself to too much content.... a lesson to be learned!
I can relate so much to the head-throbbing/numbness that comes from having your head stuck in your device, all day every day. We really need the friction, the monotony, and the unstructured thought that comes with being present. Thank you for reading 💚
Absolutely! I feel sometimes being more deliberate with the way I consume media allows me to still be connected to entertainment but not "sucked into it". For example, id say that in a moderate amount, choosing the exact song you want to listen to while on a (boring) drive allows you to be able to appreciate your surrondings more instead of just hitting shuffle. Its being conscious with /what/ media we insert into our brains that allows to slowly break away from having to /need/ the media in our day to day life. Tis better to choose to listen to music because it will improve your day rather that you needing to listen to music because your brain craves dopamine. Thats the difference between music causing a headache vs music causing enjoyment ! Just something I realized while listening to Steely Dan this afternoon...
I think you're on to something with choosing to listen to music because it will improve your day rather that you needing to listen to music because your brain craves dopamine! It reminds me of the expression I heard once on responsible drinking: "don't drink to feel better, have a drink to feel even better"!
the chop suey line made me laugh out loud. amazing work, really motivating me to keep striving for a distraction-free life
I'm so glad someone noticed that 🤣 thanks for reading Maddie! 💛
Thank you for this post!! I have been practicing being more mindful and present, and your words have inspired me to do even better. 🫶
I loved this and completely agree. For me being present reading is the thing I mourn the most so I’m trying to read at leat five pages without picking up my phone. It sounds silly but the hold it has on me🪦
Totally relate to this! When I was little I could spend hours curled up in a corner reading. Now I have this knee-jerk like reaction every 15 minutes to check something. Here's to building better deep focus!
The quote is perfection ;) and I agree, sometimes I lift my eyes from my phone and enjoy this little bubble of awareness. Everyone is self-absorbed and I'm virtually invisible!
It’s sometimes nice to feel invisible, especially in a big hectic city! But I don’t want invisible to be my “default”, which it has become in recent years 🤣
:/ awwh that's a bit sad to hear
Amen! I too have been consciously making effort to be present in similar ways as you - not taking phone out, leaving earphones out, taking in scenery when walking out and about. May we pave the change 👏🏼
That’s awesome to hear Íse! Life is so much better when we are actively joining in 🧡
This blew my mind!! I had never though about this. I had always been a headphone lover but this made me realize that maybe the sound of the outside is more meaningfull that my favorite songs. incredible work <3
I was recently in a waiting room and I knew it would take so much, I decided not to bring my phone but instead bring with me a book. I think that it changed everything and I wasn't even bored!
Rethinking life currently, thankyou for writing this amazing piece
Loved this so much! This was really well written and soo warming to read!
I love when you said about waiting in the coffee shop for your order and bypassing the urge to scroll on your phone for a minute or two -I love doing this, and taking in all the sounds and the experience as a whole that kind of gets blurred & blocked out if you're so immersed in your phone instead!
I also love going out on my own on solo dates for the reason you mentioned about talking to the waiter/cashier.. I feel when there is someone with you -you limit yourself to other interactions with other people, because you're quick to get your order then go with them, rather than spark up a conversation with the cashier -it makes me feel so whole! And also it gives you a moment of stillness & presence by looking around and observing things on your own, rather than being wrapped up in a conversation with someone else.
If i'm in a cafe having a drink/lunch, sometimes I feel it's more 'comfortable' or 'normal' to be looking at my phone.. but for a year now i've been practicing taking a break and just looking around and people watching. It feels weird at first, but it becomes okay overtime, and it feels cool to be curious about the world/other peoples lives/thoughts, and i've really enjoyed the moment more by doing that!
It's true that you hear so much more sounds & conversations, and see the beauty of things and people's lives when you don't have your headphones in or aren't on your phone!
Love you and your cat at the end! Taking the cuddle in, being fully immersed in the moment!
"We need to jump off the hamster wheel of chasing grand experiences or perfect, Instagram-worthy moments. The beauty of presence lies in its simplicity." -Totally agree with this! Can't wait to read more from you! The way you write is so beautiful!
Thank you so much for your lovely comment, Louise! I really respect you on the solo dates, it's something I rarely prioritise doing but my friends who do this regularly absolutely love them as well.
Aww, you should try one out! :) The first one feels weird and is hard, but the more you practice & repeat something the easier it gets, and it's good to prioritise your alone time and being in your own company, and it's fun because you can do whatever you want that makes you happy, and spend however much time you want on your date! It's such a good feeling & form of self-love to do regularly! x
This is perfection. And increasingly important. Thank you
Well said! It’s not an easy change but it’s well worth it. I also have been trying to find small ways to shift away from the phone and be more present. I have noticed my mind is clearer and more focused as a result, and my memory has even improved.
Also try volunteering, somewhere, anywhere. It is hard and awkward to disappear into technology when you are helping someone. And it feels really good, unlike the artificial dopamine hit you get from clicking and scrolling.
This really hit home. I’m definitely guilty of spending too much time glued to my phone or plugged into my AirPods, and it’s wild to think about how much I might be missing in those moments. Even as a raging introvert, I know that real human connection is what makes life meaningful. Inspired to be more present. Thank you for this piece!
This is a great read. I’m going to try to put some of ideas in this article into practice. Thanks.